Please help us with this very serious campaign to get booties treated nicely. They’re the most maligned creatures on Earth. You’ve been asked to adopt babies, soldiers, communities, highways, rivers, streams, cats, dogs (including pit bulls) and virtual pets. Some of you kind souls responded generously by adopting these people, creatures, things or natural wonders. Booties are natural wonders too, you know.
Now we ask only that you open your heart this one last time and hear the cries of the world’s most oppressed creature—the booty. We do NOT need your money. Only your loving hearts and your open minds.
Some of the indignities and oppressions booties are being subjected to:
Our suggested alternative to all this oppression of booties:
Adopt a booty.
First, do it generally:
If you see an overweight lady, make no comment. Do nothing, unless you know her, in which case you can nod or say Hi. The same goes for skinny ladies. Some of them have been told that they're hot since they're scrawny and underweight like clothing models. Do NOT tell them they're hot. Never tell a seriously underweight or overweight lady she looks good or looks bad, even if she's a model, in fact, especially if she's a model. (The more we do to keep this unhealthy skinniness fad alive, the harder it will be to ever change to healthier body role models in the future. Incidentally, a pretty face does NOT mean a healthy body.) If you know her and she asks for your help, feel free to guide her toward healthier diet and exercise habits so she ends up with a BMI of 20 to 27 percent. Otherwise, keep your opinions, and hands, to yourself.
If you see a "hottie," or at least someone in the healthy weight and BMI range, unless you know her, keep your comments, and hands, to yourself. If you know her, make only comments you are sure she will like and appreciate. If you're not sure, just make comments unrelated to appearance, clothing, or "hotness," such as "nice to see you," "I missed you," "how you doing?," "hello," or just "hi." If the response is negative or she pretends you're not there, it’s a sign she doesn’t need any more comments from you in the future, so please take a hint.
Now, once you're generally adopting all booties by how you act around them, it’s time to start more specific booty adoption, whether you’re male or female:
How to adopt a booty:
|A.||Admiring beauty is not now, has never been, and will never be, "sinful." God specifically made most guys, and some ladies, VERY aware of the magnificence of a beautiful female walk as He knew it would be a great boon to procreation. The more lively the walk and the more beautiful the curves, the more attractive the walk. If you're not religious, then replace "God" and "He" with "nature" and "she." It’s a "sin" to do something bad about this attraction, but fine to do something good (or simply nothing) about it. So, again, don’t look away guiltily, unless you're mentally unstable or psychotic or find yourself unable to control your reactions. In that case, PLEASE don’t look at ANYONE, and PLEASE get help. But if you're okay mentally, go ahead and act naturally: admire beautiful walks.|
|B.||Loving a beautiful walk is about aesthetics, art, and good taste. It’s not about lust. Our society needs no thought police. We’re all free to think whatever we want, regardless of who likes it. If you want to think lustful thoughts, it’s no one’s business but your own. It’s sexual repression and guilt that underlie most negativity toward women. By acknowledging a feeling you can potentially master it, whereas if it’s unconscious, it has the potential to master you. But admiring beauty leads to a feeling of admiration and appreciation—even enchantment, but NOT necessarily to ANY lustful thoughts. If a guy finds a lady to be a turn-on and he wants to take it further, that’s what dating and marriage are for. If the guy merely wants to have a sexy fantasy about her, it’s a free country. She expects to create such fantasies—she's not blind to her charms. But she has a right to expect he’ll not comment, grope, whistle, or oppress her in any way. She does NOT have the right to expect heads to refrain from turning toward her and smiles of appreciation to be suppressed. Its only natural for guys to love to look at women and women to love to look at guys. Accept it!|
If she says okay, CONGRATULATIONS: you’ve just adopted your first booty! Once you’ve videotaped her and entered the contest with her, go find another willing lady and adopt her booty too! There's no way you can adopt too many booties. Find dozens. It’s good for the culture, good for you, good for them, and good for booty-kind. And booty-hood. And the booty-sphere. Don’t just think Green. Think Pink! Don’t just be an environmentalist and guard our creatures, species, forests, lakes, rivers, and streams. Beautify the environment by bootyfying it! There's a whole media/Hollywood/modeling industry out there telling everyone that all ladies without skinny booties are fatsos. Call them on their lie. Let people see the falsity of their ideas on the Poetry in Motion website. Let people see the beauty of booty and the beautiful walk that only a lady can possess.
If we can make this a big enough cultural phenomenon, we’ll next be trying to get Congress to set up the following national holidays:
Beautiful Walking Contest seeks the most beautiful walk in an effort to support and promote the aesthetics of curvaceous beautifully walking women, will award great prizes to the best three entries. In addition, every contestant gets talent listings with photos in two different Pin The Tail On The Culture directories: The Beautiful Walking Directory and The Backside Blessed Directory. And every contestant will have her walking video showcased for all to see at the contest site along with her email and website or MySpace address links.
Photographers win too!
Photographers may enter the contest. One photographer can theoretically win all three prizes for photographing the three best entries! In addition, all photographers who enter will receive email and website links along with their entered videos, as well as experiencing the joy of adopting a booty.
Beautiful walkers, not necessarily beautiful women
This contest isn’t necessarily for beautiful women, but beautifully walking women—the face is irrelevant, only the walk is important. The company will showcase all acceptable entries on the company’s contest website, http://poetryinmotion.info along with links to the contestant’s web address or email. When winners are picked in January 2007, they’ll be announced on the site.
"You don’t have to be pretty to win," says spokesperson Michelle Taylor, "like you do in most contests for women. You just need to walk really nicely. And we’re not looking for skinny models—we consider them bad role models. You can win even if your face doesn’t show on the video you send in. This contest is about the beauty of a yummy walk. Poetry in motion. It helps if you have the right body type to really look beautiful when you walk."
Taylor goes on to say that "An important reason to call attention to shapely females and their beautiful walks is to help fight the tyranny of the skinny fashion model body role model that’s being drilled daily into the heads of this country’s females. The young are especially vulnerable to the media’s portrayal of emaciated females as ‘attractive.’ The media has created unhealthy, unrealistic standards that are dangerous (and even fatal), as well as oppressive and psychologically damaging."
The prizes to be awarded are:
Prizes: SEE CONTEST SITE FOR DETAILS. The prizes will be awarded to either the contestant or the photographer, or it may be shared by the two if they enter jointly.
No purchase is necessary and no entry fee is required. The contest ends at 11:59 PM (PT) on December 31 of each year (but if no acceptable entries have been received by this date, this deadline could be extended).
Contestants should mail AVI DV files, WMV files, MOV files, or MPEG files on a CD or DVD. These must be data files for PCs, not files for TV set-top DVD players. Detailed entry information is available at the contest website at http://poetryinmotion.info —note this is NOT a .com address.
Contestants and their photographers must be 18 years or older, US citizens from any state except Florida, Rhode Island, or Arizona, or where prohibited.
Contestants can go to the http://poetryinmotion.info site and watch the hostess demonstrate a pretty walk. They’ll see that she just lets her backside’s muscles relax so her walk isn't tight and plastic and guarded and uninteresting. Uninteresting walking is perfect for ladies walking in public. It’s part of what's called street smarts. But uninteresting walking is NOT poetry in motion!
Photographers should design their camerawork to pay attention to and focus on beautiful movement. They can see examples both at http://poetryinmotion.info as well as another Pin the Tail On The Culture site: http://fannyandtheassets.com , where five different exercise videos emphasize the beauty of BOOTY-full curves creating beautiful movements.
Pin the Tail on the Culture’s mission is to challenge the prevailing dominance of the skinny clothing model, which is the body role model that is constantly pounded into women and girls by the media. Medical advice says that women should have 20% to 27% body fat. Models and movie stars starving themselves to the point of skin and bones is unhealthy and portrays harmful examples for young women. Approximately 1000 women a year DIE from disorders like anorexia and bulimia. The media’s obsession with the lie of body fat being bad and evil and ugly is often a significant factor in these deaths. It’s also a factor in the obesity epidemic, since it’s easy for dieters to give up and go in the direction of overeating when they’re taunted by impossible standards.
Of special interest to photographers and videographers
Pin the Tail on the Culture also provides an inexpensive Video Backgrounds and Photos product for photographers and editors to integrate into backgrounds or green/blue screen projects or web pages or brochures. Only $19.95 for 8.5 gigabytes of AVIs and JPEGs with a 17-page tutorial--including how to edit with optional tools like Ulead Media Studio Pro 7 or 8, Serious Magic's Ultra 2, and green screens. Includes an abundance of good, clear examples: http://fannyandtheassets.com/videobackgroundsphotos/index.html
Exercise videos with healthy images and healthy messages
Pin the Tail on the Culture’s exercise videos (available on the contest website http://fannyandtheassets.com) have no skinny ladies (and skinny ladies won't win the walking contest either) and no adamant instructions on losing fat or getting skinny, just encouragement to be healthy with regular exercise done to pleasant music.
The exercise videos and walking contest both tell women they're okay as they are and needn't starve themselves to conform to the prevailing skin and bones fad. The videos provide better and healthier body role models for women to exercise with. And the contest tells women that no matter whether they’re pretty or homely, and whether they have large sized backsides, thighs, or chests or just average, they can be very beautiful walkers that are truly poetry in motion to watch.Why is this newsworthy?
About the contest sponsor
Pin the Tail on the Culture is committed to providing alternative images of women in the media. It can be found on the web at: